< Xalior> As someone who's lived in shitty terrorist hastled places all over the world. They're all cunts, I don't think there's a lesser or greater cunt to it. No-one has that right, be it knife or semtex or hairgel and an ipod.
< resiak> I have that t-shirt on
< neuro_> hairgel and an ipod, excellent

12:58  * tony dislikes mrben
12:58 <        tony> oops
12:58  * tony dislikes mediawiki
12:58 <    Treenaks> hm, confusing mrben and mediawiki...
12:59 <      Xalior> Treenaks: anyones allowed to insert anything they want into one, and the other's a wiki.

<Xalior> bbcnews are saying: "It was a nailbomb containing nails."
<Xalior> That’s quality journalism for you.
<davee> Like, as opposed to a nail bomb containing, say, twiglets?
<Xalior> exactly lejts comment: "as apposed to a nail bomb containing kittens"

* Omahn made the mistake of clicking the 'random' link on wikipedia the other day, at work.. you can guess the rest
< Xalior> how many lost?
< Omahn> 2 hours.
< Xalior> oh dear.
< Omahn> 2 bloody hours...
< Xalior> What did you learn?
< Xalior> (other than don't click random)
< Omahn> About vitamins and some US state I haven't even heard of.

<reuben> http://www.lugradio.org/live/2005/attractions.php
<dannya> ah
<reuben> looks like fun though
<reuben> who is going to be on the kde stand?
<Xalior> victims.

<Xalior> Essk: Shall I stick the kettle on?
<Xalior> Me: I like my tea like I like my sex
<Xalior> ... Any way it fucking comes.
<neuro_> scaldingly hot?
<Xalior> \o/
<neuro_> electrified?
<tonytiger> Hot with two lumps?
<Elleo> tied up in a small bag?
<Xalior> I'll have two cups of electrified tea, and can someone remove this eel from my arse please?
<Cillian> "I like my girls how I like my whiskey; 10 years old and mixed up with coke"

12:52 < Xalior> sward - GeeAyeJoe's manloveslave
12:52 < GeeAyeJoe> yes

* Xalior elaborately fills in all the details on a phished email/paypal scam he gets as "Suck My Balls" before hitting submit.

< LeadArseJoe> kubuntu is just as bongo as ubuntu

 * Phated waves at SlimeyPete and fucks into bed.

felimwhite : Jono: Do a talk over here will you !
Elleo : felimwhiteley: unfortunately jono has been banned from France after one too many cheese, onion, garlic and frogs joke
Elleo : also, that sounds like the worst crisp flavour ever.

<Cillian> youch
<Cillian> gentoo on a pentium 2 is *not* fun :-)
<fuzzix> s/on a pentium 2 //
<ormiret> s/on a pentium 2// ?
<fuzzix> Heh :)
<ormiret> ah well great minds and all that...
<fuzzix> Fools seldom etc.

resiak : Anyway, I'm looking forward to being anally probed in customs, under powers granted by the Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act of 2001
fuzzix : Intercept and Obstruct bowels?
resiak : absolutely
fuzzix : This is why I don't fly. "I'd like to go over there please." "Not before we viciously fingerfuck you!"
fuzzix : And that was just the travel agent.

<davee> Yesterday evening I taught BOFHlet #2 to say "Ni!" as in the Knights Who Say...
<davee> I told BOFHl;et #1 that if she didn't eat up all her food, I'd get her little sister to say "Ni!" to her until she did
<davee> "Ni! Ni!", said the little one
<ChairmanMiaow> davee: i'm proud of you too :-)
<davee> I was *rolling* on the floor, Mrs davee however was slightly less impressed ;-)
* landstalker is on a detox
<Xalior> davee: How old is BOFTlet #2?
<davee> Xalior: 21 months (2 years in March)
<Xalior> davee: :D
<davee> Today, I will train her to also ask for a "shrubbery"

* jaholden (n=james@6.sheffield.plus.net) has joined #lugradio
<jaholden> JOIN #lugradio
<aquarion> You're already in #lugradio
<mrben> :)
<jaholden> aquarion: dumb irc client
<aquarion> Your attempt to rejoin a channel you are in causes a rift in space time, you die. You have scored 4 out of a maximum 20045 points, which gives you a level of "Gentoo User"
<mrben> roflmao
<jaholden> how'd you know I'm a gentoo user?

* Ghworg makes note "Ask lejt about anal"

<joeolivas> here’s a random question:  what are house prices for say, a 1500 sq ft house where everyone lives?
<PerfDave> joeolivas: As opposed to a 1500sq ft house where everyone dies? :)
* |kat| has no idea what a 1500sq ft house would look like
<PerfDave> |kat|: Imagine a house 3 feet wide and 500 feet long
* h|barbobot thinks it would look like a 1400sq ft house
<h|barbobot> with 100 more sq ft

* JetlagJen has cordless phones at work, and they keep making odd noises.
<mrben> JetlagJen: like what?
<davee> JetlagJen: When that happens, you’re supposed to pick them  up and talk to the person calling you.

16:30 <@mrben> teh wife said last night that I could shave my head once we've had our second child
16:31  * mrben will be sticking a pin through the condom packet tonight

<Sionide> any clever people awake?
<cdn> I like to think I'm clever at times. But I'm not entirely convinced that I am awake yet.
<Elleo> I like to think I'm awake at times. But I'm not entirely convinced that I am clever yet.

<Omahn> presumed that mrben was the lugradio god :-)
<h|barbobot> presumed that FSM was the lugradio god
< neuro_> I AM THE LUGRADIO GOD, BOW BEFORE ME!
  * Omahn bows
< neuro_> SON OF JOR-EL, KNEEL BEFORE GOD^WZOD!
< h|barbobot> I will not bow!
 * kNo` won't bow for anyone, except the Flying Spaghetti Monster
 < h|barbobot> kNo`: may his noodly appendege touch you and bless you in all of your sauces
* Xalior locks h|barbobot  and kNo` together and expects to see odd pasta babies soon.
 < kNo`> Xalior: with meatballs???
 < h|barbobot> one can only hope!
 < kNo`> RAMEN

14:32 < Phated> Xalior: No, I'm 17 :)
14:32 < Phated> And indiscriminate!
14:33 < Phated> We are the ind*minate! :)
14:33  * h|barbobot is a bot trapped in a pirate meat sack wrapped in a zombie
          unifom
14:33 < Phated> Xalior: See, next to h|barbobot, you're not so bad ;)
14:33 < h|barbobot> YOU WILL BE EXTERMINATED
14:33 < Phated> Xalior: Also, I should have thought of this earlier, but:
                "Desperate would be dancing with nlindblad, not you."
14:34 < mavit> Hang on, did you just claim to be 17 and horny on IRC?  Doesn't
               that make you a 43 year old paedophile from Hull?
14:34 < Prof_Frink> Indeed it does.
14:34 < Phated> Oh, for fuck's sake, not again.

* davee goes off to do another Thunderbird installation
<Kirok> ^sure theres a joke in that about a countdown just cant think of it
<neuro|laptop> <Kirok> ^sure theres a joke in that about a countdown just cant think of it
<neuro|laptop> website - FIVE!
<neuro|laptop> download - FOUR!
<neuro|laptop> install - THREE!
<neuro|laptop> configure - TWO!
<neuro|laptop> read email - ONE!
<neuro|laptop> THUNDERBIRD IS GO!
<Kirok> neuro|laptop: Nice one :)
<neuro|laptop> dum dada dumdumdum, etc
<kNo‘> neuro|laptop: :D

* davee had a very strange ET-inspired dream last night
davee : mrben, Omahn, Xalior, Neuro and me plus a few  others were holed up in some house in the middle of the countryside, clearly on the run.  The SAS stormed the building and we *kicked their arses*
mrben : davee: rofl
* davee is clearly playing too much ET

< Blue9> You know what I really love, ignoring sales guys.
< neuro|laptop> ask them to talk like pirates
< neuro|laptop> or Yoda
< neuro|laptop> otherwise you won’t buy anything

<Elleo> mm, we have a cock+beard:noise ratio to keep up
<Blue9> lol
<Elleo> otherwise we lose our status as the official IRC channel

* jono spots a ginger minger in the room...
<aquarius> jono: you love the cock.
* jono picks up a frying pan and thwacks aquarius right in the chops...
< jono> :)

-!- neuro|laptop changed the topic of #lugradio to: #lugraaaadio | http://lugradio.org/ | http://clan.lugradio.org/ | S2E23 "Ironic podcast hatred" be out, now be Summer Sailin'! Landlubbin' in October! | Seven Seas #lugradio - http://www.rimron.co.uk/lugradio - avast ye planet.lugradio@xalior.com (RSS2, nick and hackergotchi) | mrben's wench awa' Sunday 25/09; everyone be expected for pillagin' on ET at 8 | Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day: http://www.yarr.org.uk/

< hughe> i once went delirious and though that everyone was linux processess
< hughe> and they kept dying
< hughe> and i was paniching because i hadnt caught their exit codes

<@Xalior> I'm about to kill kittens.
<@Xalior> I found all the parts to build a Hyperthreading P4, put them in a box, went to bed, woke up, box filled with cat piss.

* neuro_ points out to anyone listening from a copyright enforcement agency, this is a comedy skit about peer to peer - none of the downloading events described have taken place, and the files documented are fictional.  No copyrighted material was harmed in the making of this IRC channel.  Except Tom Cruise movies.  We downloaded those bastards and deleted them without watching them. Ha ha.
      

00:15 <Xalior> I need a huge working favour.
00:15 <Xalior> Could you, please, phone/sms/contact your friend who I shared the train home with.
00:15 <Xalior> I need a dapper CD.
00:16 <Xalior> I presume you've have drowned him with them by now.
00:16 <Xalior> I need to get rid of this fucking SuSE thing and install something proper on my thinkpad.
00:16 <Xalior> Currently using XP
00:16 <Xalior> Could he, if he has one, as he cycles to work...
00:16 <Xalior> could he drop it into my hotel?
00:17 <Xalior> leave it at the Reception Desk for Romm 112
00:17 <Xalior> It'd be a super-love-diamond-forver favour.
00:17 <Xalior> Unless you can think of somewhere I can get one easily.
00:17 <Xalior> Oh, I suppose I could just buy a blank CD and use free wifi.
00:17 <Xalior> That'll work.
00:17 <Xalior> Now to find a blank CD.
00:17 <Xalior> Forget that.
00:17 <Xalior> Don't need you any more.
00:17 <Xalior> Thanks any.
00:17 <Xalior> :D
00:18  * Xalior goes back to bed.

< h|barbobot> So i had my orange glasses friend over for a visit the other day
< h|barbobot> and he asked to use my computer
< h|barbobot> and asked about how i made windows look so cool

< kNo`> <accent>ouereu ize ze bleudy skedioule iou weure supposed to
              peubliche?</accent>
< kNo`> ;)
< jono> heh
< jono> la fuck off

<winteruk> so has any one seen nlindblad?
<the_angry_angel> not for some time
<Phated> A few days ago.
* nlindblad (n=nlindbla@user179.217-10-120.netatonce.net) has joined #lugradio
<nlindblad> yo
<winteruk> speak of the devil
<winteruk> nlindblad, lo
<nlindblad> I'm the devil
<nlindblad> cool

< nlindblad> ?
< nlindblad> what are you quoting?
< mrben> 13:50 < nlindblad> weird
< mrben> 13:50 < nlindblad> "mount: Permission denied"
< mrben> 13:51 < Essk> ...must... resist! ;)
< mrben> 13:51 < h|barbobot> im trying
< mrben> 13:51 < h|barbobot> believe me im trying
< h|barbobot> nlindblad: maybe if you sang mount a beautiful song then
                    bought it dinner, you would get further
< nlindblad> I am root
< nlindblad> I shouldn't have to
< h|barbobot> most women wouldnt agree

<sward> Heh, I think you deserve to have to go to the armoury to get one of those freakin battlesuits :P
<sward> actually, it can be kept that way, but in "learning mode", where it tells aliens they can press Q to evolve, it should say "Go to the armoury for upgrades" or somethign
<sward> Knowing what the armoury looks like would help though..
<Ghworg> I got the option to spawn as the powerful aliens, no need to press Q or anything
<Ghworg> I assumed that I just hadn't killed enough aliens to get the better stuff as a human
<Cillian> talking about tremulous??
<sward> No, we're talking about real life, where we press letters on a keyboard and mutate

<landstalker> I had a serious sleep deprevation issue last night. Woke at four to be faced with someone floating next to my bed staring at the wall behind me, so I looked at the wall and when I turned round they'd gone
<Cillian> wtf!?
<Cillian> floating?
<Cillian> wtf have you been smoking!?
<landstalker> well sort of as if they were lying in an invisable bed, but sat up
<landstalker> nothing
<Winter-uk> probably holosinations
<landstalker> I get it a lot
<Cillian> oookay... that's wierd
<landstalker> usualy when doubled with lack of sleep.
<landstalker> I've seen rats in the bed, some weird half wasp half spider thing, a UFO/orb
<Cillian> wierd
<landstalker> yup
<landstalker> scary as fuck when your knackered already
<Cillian> okay, physics time...
<Winter-uk> ive seen dancing gnomes with knifes before
<landstalker> heh, cool
<Cillian> that is, if I can rememebr where i've left it
<Cillian> Winter-uk: better than seeing KDE by your bed... *shudder*

<nlindblad> QDB doesn't exactly show my good sides
<tonytiger> You have good sides?

<nlindblad> Phated: someday I'll have sex with you
<nlindblad> Phated: we both know that
<tony> Probably three of four days after she's dead.
<tony> *or
<Leeds> tony: could also be three of four... someone else could have the other day
<tony> lol
<tony> or, he could be having sloppy thirds from the corpse.
<Phated> ... DEAD?
<tony> It's the only way, I think.

While discussing "Odd things on my local free-cycle list":

<Dave2>      12. WANTED: Small electric propagator: Frome
<Dave2> WTF is that?
< Xalior> Dave2: seed tray with a little plastic greehouse-esque lid, that sits on a reptile-style heating pad.
<Dave2> ah, of course
<Dave2>       4. Wanted-   cardboard boxes, chippenham
<Xalior> Dave2: someone probably moving house. It's how we got a lot of our boxes when we moved. :)
<Dave2>      13. WANTED Double bed
<resiak>      16: WANTED sex
<Dave2> certainly.
<resiak>      21. WANTED asian schoolgirls
<resiak>      22. WANTED cages
<Treenaks>     23. ...
<Treenaks>      24. Profit!
* resiak *spit* LOLs

* greenpenguin13 is a geek who doesn't even know what a life is
<Prof_Frink> greenpenguin13: It's the thing you get when you collect 100 coins

<GingerDog> anyone know of a good way of tracking a memory leak in .php scripts?
<Treenaks> GingerDog: switch to perl :P
<yonkeltron> GingerDog: ignore Treenaks. switch to python
<Treenaks> yonkeltron: ANY language but php, basically
<Treenaks> (BASICally? :)
<yonkeltron> Treenaks: hahah!
<yonkeltron> Treenaks: just smalltalk between friends eh?
<yonkeltron> Treenaks: i met this cute girl named ada
<Treenaks> yonkeltron: she brainfucked you?
<yonkeltron> Treenaks: dunno what her last name was but it started with a c
<yonkeltron> Treenaks: it was rather sharp...
<yonkeltron> Treenaks: so i bought her a cup of java
<Treenaks> yonkeltron: ah.. and then you let her meet your python
<yonkeltron> Treenaks: well no, she didn't like my lisp
<yonkeltron> Treenaks: i wasn't ABLE to cut it
<Treenaks> yonkeltron: you should've given her a Ruby, or a Perl
<yonkeltron> i offered to take her out for curry
<Treenaks> yonkeltron: now she's seeing one 'Pascal'?
<yonkeltron> Treenaks: nah. she rode off on her caml
<yonkeltron> to some town called delphi
<yonkeltron> with some duy named dylan

<nlindblad> Gentoo is better than girls

< sward> Actually, for some reason, Galeon has reverted to being my default browser..
< resiak> sward: It uses sensible-browser by default on Debian.
< sward> resiak: I know, sensible-browser should be firefox
< sward> resiak: galeon is most certainly not sensible
< sward> it maybe when it works
< resiak> sward: So fix what x-www-browser is, with update-alternatives
< sward> but not yet
< sward> resiak: I did!
< sward> resiak: Read what I said you moron
< sward> resiak: I said it "reverted to being galeon" or some such
< sward> *reverted*
< resiak> I see
< resiak> sorry
< resiak> Xalior: http://www.cheeplinux.com/index.php?cPath=73&osCsid=1f9584e5652f9f0bce7a72353de6f28a # I see no mug!
< Xalior> resiak: Read what I said you moron
< resiak> ARGH
< Xalior> He said he had more in stock, just not with him. :)
-!- resiak has left #lugradio ["You guys are mean :("]
-!- resiak has joined #lugradio
< Xalior> *laugh*
< Xalior> maybe we should make Nov 4th national "Call resiak a moron" day :)
< JetlagJen> Xalior: can I join in? :-)
< resiak> Xalior: Okay.
< sparkes> resiak, you are offically a moron
< JetlagJen> resiak: you’re a moron :-P
< sparkes> it’s a national day as well
< Xalior> JetlagJen: depends, are you a nation? :)
< resiak> :(
 * resiak cleans himself.

< cypher_> cat caramel_digestives > /dev/mouth
* popey decides now is the time for a spot of r-type leo
< Ghworg> cypher_: You’ve trained your cat to feed you biscuits?  Cool!  :-)

< JetlagJen> The depth of my boss’s computer savvy never ceases to amaze me.
< JetlagJen> He just parctically had a fit because he thought he’d brokan a machine he happened to be sitting next to.
< JetlagJen> He did shout "Oh, hell!" and get our girl-who-lloks-after-computers to come and look at it.
< JetlagJen> The funny bit is when I realised what had caused his outburst.
< JetlagJen> The screen had gone black.
< JetlagJen> Because the screensaver had come on.

<mrben> 2 friends leave school and meet up later on.
<mrben> Bobby: I just got a job with the council
<mrben> Tommy: Ooooo - don’t look out the window in the mornings
<mrben> Bobby: Why not
<mrben> Tommy: Because you’ll have nothing to do in the afternoons....

<Elleo> damn you jono; you just caused me to spurt a sticky mess all over my clothes :(
<Elleo> teach me to drink whilst listening to lugradio

<kNo‘> hey I’m watching you! What did you say behind my back?
<Xalior> kNo‘: that you were a girl who doesn’t drink TVRs :P
<kNo>‘ Xalior: tasted like piss
<Xalior> kNo‘: THen I guess mrben like downing piss
<mrben> satans piss
<PerfDave> Mmm, downing piss ;)